Bonjour mes cheris,

Last night we ‘ad some very strange visitors to Cafe Rene.

Ze night started normallly enough – I got ready for my shift.

René was very dashing, as usual.

We prepared ze kitchen for ze night a’ead.

All of a zudden, customers started to arrive. But zer attire was very unusual..

Zuddenly I found myself in a newsroom, with a lady who kept offering to make me friendship bracelets.

Ze news was very gripping last night.

What time is it? Zis chap ‘ad the answer.

I felt very safe despite ze strangers, due to ze presence of some superheroes.

Aww zere were lovely ladies all innocent and white.

Zen things went a bit mental – people from ze past and future showed up. Not to mention ze lady with ze crazy axe.

I think Wally found himself.

Ah an ambassador from ze Kazakhstani embassy showed up too.

Soon everyone was contributing news stories.

Zis lady brought cake so we were ‘appy.

René was very busy but I still got to spend a little time wiz ‘im.

I didn’t know they ‘ad cameras under ze sea. There you go.

Then ze people started pairing off. I think ze Dude scored anyway.

‘E looked pretty ‘appy.

Zut alors! Batman is under attack!

Dorozzy acted very out of character. Auntie Em would not approve.

Zere were news updates throughout ze night.

And much singing.

Zis is Mairead’s news face.

She is an ‘arsh interviewer.

Aww zere was much romance too.

Zis is my duck. He dressed up too.

Bits of outfits were switched around.

Borat liked zis ad. He like!

Deb looking stern. Mairead looking very un-news-like.

Ze ambassador headed back to Kazakhstan.

Dorozzy was unafraid of ze angry man.

Zis fellow performed a mind meld.

René chatted to all ze customers as usual.

Another mind meld. I think Deb was initiating zem.

Everybody dance now!

Or Borat dance on ‘is own.

I was mixing with an imaginary deck.

Oh ze raunch.

Dorozzy got a little tired.

Zere was a scobe ‘anging around with Borat and Wilma.

Aww, she fell asleep.

René got a new ‘at.

Ha ha they eat dust in Spain.

Aww this little dog wasn’t allowed in the pub.

See, we arrived in Madrid by night, but when we woke up the next day, this was the first thing we saw.
We weren’t thrilled.

But that was only the start of it.

Apparently Madrid had been having some class of a drought, and had been praying for rain.
Cheers lads.

Anyway we went about our business. Here’s Jayz.

Mal wanted to buy this Lord of the Rings yoke.

Who would throw out a mannequin? They’re obviously not students.

We spent a lot of time in places like this. Wherever there was grub to be had.

And wine to be had.

Dunno who these singing Spanish lads are but they were everywhere.

Night and day.

A nice man took this for us. He told me my camera was bueno. I am great at Spanish.

This is an art yoke at the Reina Sofia place. We saw Guernica too which was brilliant but you’re not allowed take photos.
Fair enough like.

I love them oul audio guides.

This was a cool gay magazine we found. I tore the best ad out of it but you have to come to our house to see it.

This is Mal contemplating two mojitos. But one of them was MINE!

Nice continental type tile there.

Em we went for an oul boccadillo at the end of Saturday night and saw this in the shop.

I also thought this was quite mental home decor.

These are me new boots, aren’t they savage?

I threw Mal out of the house at one stage.

Here I am doing a cool peace sign.

Here is Mal, suitably impressed with Spanish architecture.

Bet you can’t find Mal there. It’ll take a few minutes.

He had trouble finding his way out.

Took him ages. (This amused us greatly)

But he sped out in the end.

Very tall statues.

Mal taking pictures of a pimp and his crew.

Aww nice fountain.

This is El Rondo. Like Spanish Match of the Day. Only with TWELVE pundits. Imagine twelve Eamonn Dunphys.

Mal took this ourra the plane. I just like the colours.

Michael Palin on Home and Away

Apparently this was actually broadcast. Quare posh.

If it wasn’t for this, we mightn’t have been able to go on holidays. Home and Away is that exciting at the moment.

Rachel sent me this. She said it was funny.
And it is.

4 of these pictures are of a hopeless law enforcer. Who’s in the other picture? Tick tock.

Spinnin’ out to Blanch, chased by the Special Branch

I flippin’ KNOW this is old news but it is class. Oim Spoiral oi meen what oi say.